It's all downhill from here...
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Friday, January 6, 2012
Day 220: Stop. Focus. Click... On Disguises
Out of the four of us, I must say that Tony's mustache disguise is by far the most convincing.
Oh the things we come up with as reasons to take breaks from work.
Oh the things we come up with as reasons to take breaks from work.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Day 219: Remember the Time... Uber Confidence Does Not Always Help Win Bets
Every school day during first grade, we'd start the day by reciting the pledge of allegiance, then would recite the names of the U.S. Presidents. Their pictures formed the border around the classroom. We started with just Washington, then every few days would add the president's successor so before long we'd be reciting, "Washington, Adams, Jefferson, Madison, Monroe..." all the way to George W. Bush.
Brent did not know this about me, so when he was boasting about how easy it was to name all the NFL teams, which was one of Sporcle's daily challenges today, I retorted that naming sports teams was too easy and that I bet he couldn't get a perfect score on the "Name All The U.S. Presidents" quiz.
He, predictably, said there was no way I could do that either, so I pulled up the quiz and said, "What do you wanna bet?" I then (stupidly) agreed to something completely ridiculous if I lost because I was that confident that I'd win.
I had 10 minutes to name them all and named 40 out of 42 in under four minutes. But then I started panicking because I always get tripped up with the order around Teddy Roosevelt because I tend to skip the five presidents between him and Franklin Roosevelt.
This was the case this time, so I started thinking about my work with the U.S. Presidents on the timelines project I am working on at work. That worked for four of the five names.
There was just one I could not think about as I watched the clock tick down to zero.
Woodrow Wilson. I got all the "forgotten" presidents, like Harrison, who served just 32 days in office, but forgot Woodrow Wilson - the star of the "Bart the Lover" Simpsons episode where Bart writes love letters to his teacher Mrs. Krabappel to get revenge on her for giving him a month's detention.
Therefore, I lost the bet. And was taught a little something about my confidence. Brent has told me several times that it's great to be confident, but oftentimes I'm so confident that it turns into cockiness and rubs people the wrong way.
And of course when you're overly confident about something and it backfires, it's that much more shattering to you when you lose.
But I learned something about myself and vow to try to be confident, but not cocky. And keep the trash talking to myself because I just feel silly when I can't back that up.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Day 218: If I Ruled Lichtenstein... You Won't Find A Penny And Pick It Up
In the United States, there are 11 forms of currency up to the $20 bill. We have the penny, nickel, dime, quarter, half-dollar, dollar coin, $1 bill, $2 bill, $5 bill, $10 bill, and $20 bill. I don't mind having change in my pockets, but all the different types of currency seems silly.
But it's necessary because of the way items in every store is priced. It's rare to find something that costs $10. It will either be priced $9.95 or $9.99. With taxes, that item will end up costing a consumer $10.61.
In Lichtenstein, we're only gong to have paper money in denominations that make sense - $1, $5, $10, and $20. And taxes will either be non-existent or, more likely, included. Therefore, items will cost whole numbers, and when you see an item that costs $10 at a store, you will need just $10 to purchase that item. No more digging for exact change or paying for gas with a bag of pennies.
The only negative I see with this plan is that since there won't be any coin money in my country, people will miss out on the pure joy of finding a heads-up quarter glinting on the ground just begging to be picked up.
I guess people will have to settle for finding lost dollar bills.
But it's necessary because of the way items in every store is priced. It's rare to find something that costs $10. It will either be priced $9.95 or $9.99. With taxes, that item will end up costing a consumer $10.61.
In Lichtenstein, we're only gong to have paper money in denominations that make sense - $1, $5, $10, and $20. And taxes will either be non-existent or, more likely, included. Therefore, items will cost whole numbers, and when you see an item that costs $10 at a store, you will need just $10 to purchase that item. No more digging for exact change or paying for gas with a bag of pennies.
The only negative I see with this plan is that since there won't be any coin money in my country, people will miss out on the pure joy of finding a heads-up quarter glinting on the ground just begging to be picked up.
I guess people will have to settle for finding lost dollar bills.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Day 217: What Did Batman Say to Robin... About The Real World
Holy candles on your birthday cake Batman!
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
I've always maintained that if I could be any age forever, I would be 10 years old. You're at the age where you have some independence, but a large part of your life is still play. By this point you have friends, still believe in magic, and use your imagination. Plus, you can still rely on your parents to make you all your meals and take care of you and in some circumstances still whine about the unfairness of life.
As I've gotten older, I realized that I think I'd rather be 18 years old forever. At that age, you have a driver's license so you'd be free to drive anywhere. Plus, you could still get away with not having a job without it being pathetic. You'd be an adult so you could make adult decisions, but any dumb ones could be attributed to the fact that you're still "just a teenager."
Maybe this is because one of the greatest times of my life was October through January of my senior year of high school. I was single, I had a great group of friends, and I was having a blast.
Regardless which age I choose - of which I'm leaning toward 18 - it won't be an age over 18. Over 18 means the real world, which I was not prepared for nor do I particularly like. When I was sheltered, I believed in things and thought things were possible.
So how old would I be if I didn't know I was 29?
Independent Yet Sheltered From The Bad Of The World Years Old.
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
I've always maintained that if I could be any age forever, I would be 10 years old. You're at the age where you have some independence, but a large part of your life is still play. By this point you have friends, still believe in magic, and use your imagination. Plus, you can still rely on your parents to make you all your meals and take care of you and in some circumstances still whine about the unfairness of life.
As I've gotten older, I realized that I think I'd rather be 18 years old forever. At that age, you have a driver's license so you'd be free to drive anywhere. Plus, you could still get away with not having a job without it being pathetic. You'd be an adult so you could make adult decisions, but any dumb ones could be attributed to the fact that you're still "just a teenager."
Maybe this is because one of the greatest times of my life was October through January of my senior year of high school. I was single, I had a great group of friends, and I was having a blast.
Regardless which age I choose - of which I'm leaning toward 18 - it won't be an age over 18. Over 18 means the real world, which I was not prepared for nor do I particularly like. When I was sheltered, I believed in things and thought things were possible.
So how old would I be if I didn't know I was 29?
Independent Yet Sheltered From The Bad Of The World Years Old.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Day 216: Never Have I Ever... Been The Only Woman at a Gentleman's Club With Her Clothes On
I spent my 21st birthday at a male strip club in Canada. Where the drinking age is 19. Go figure.
I wrote a news story about the proliferation of nudity in places where nudity isn't legal - like in clubs and bars during wet T-shirt contests that turned into no T-shirts or pants contests.
I've both watched porn for my own enjoyment and while at work while I was working on a potential story about a Toledo police officer doing porn in his city uniform. I've seen movies with scenes in strip clubs.
And I've eaten strip steak at the restaurant in the most expensive strip club in New York City.
But never have I ever actually sat and watched a female stripper do her thing, then go up to the stage to tip her and have her reward me by burying my face in her chest.
I recently went to one of the several strip clubs in Toledo on a random Tuesday and was expecting to see less-than-stellar talent. It was a weekday and we were in Toledo, after all.
I, however, was pleasantly surprised right after walking through the door and seeing a tall, thin, attractive blond with small, but natural breasts onstage. The next girl was black and curvy in the right places.
"Where do they get these girls?" I asked the friend who dragged me to the "gentleman's club" in which I willingly obliged because I had never been to it before.
Most of the other girls were tall and thin with nice moves onstage, but absolutely no breasts. I was shocked at the fact that there was absolutely nothing ("bee stings" my friend said when I mentioned them). If I had just been looking at their chests and nothing more, I would have thought they were men.
While I was watching them do their thing, all I wanted to do was pay one of them enough for her to tell me the truth - do they actually enjoy any part of their job? Which part? What do they actually want to be doing (the real answer; not the one they give the clients)? Do their friends and family know what they do? How high/drunk are they when they're dancing?
I had thought that my friend would get extra attention for being there with a woman. He wasn't, after all, one of those creepy guys who go to a strip club alone.
The opposite happened, however, which surprised me. He got zero attention and the guys who were there alone or with a buddy got all the attention, which led me to conclude that a woman may be the best wingman, but not to pick up strippers.
I was also surprised how much the men could touch the women. They weren't coping a feel or anything, but they were running their hands up and down their legs and backs when they were dancing, which I had thought was strictly forbidden. But this was also not exactly the classiest place, so you live and learn.
So after we had watched all the strippers, we picked our favorite (which happened to be the blond we saw right when we walked in) to tip. I saw the way the women were picking up the tips from the other tippers (including with their crotch as they did this crazy headstand flip to trap the bill between their legs), so I was a little nervous and was hoping just to give the girl some cash.
So when I slid the dollar bill toward her, I kind of pulled away. She, however, gave me a wide grin and leaned in toward me like she was going to give me a hug. Instead she mashed my face against her breast and I left still smelling her perfume on my shirt.
Never have I ever gone to a strip club to watch the show, and next time I'll see if I can have that conversation with one of the girls to assuage my curiosity.
I wrote a news story about the proliferation of nudity in places where nudity isn't legal - like in clubs and bars during wet T-shirt contests that turned into no T-shirts or pants contests.
I've both watched porn for my own enjoyment and while at work while I was working on a potential story about a Toledo police officer doing porn in his city uniform. I've seen movies with scenes in strip clubs.
And I've eaten strip steak at the restaurant in the most expensive strip club in New York City.
But never have I ever actually sat and watched a female stripper do her thing, then go up to the stage to tip her and have her reward me by burying my face in her chest.
I recently went to one of the several strip clubs in Toledo on a random Tuesday and was expecting to see less-than-stellar talent. It was a weekday and we were in Toledo, after all.
I, however, was pleasantly surprised right after walking through the door and seeing a tall, thin, attractive blond with small, but natural breasts onstage. The next girl was black and curvy in the right places.
"Where do they get these girls?" I asked the friend who dragged me to the "gentleman's club" in which I willingly obliged because I had never been to it before.
Most of the other girls were tall and thin with nice moves onstage, but absolutely no breasts. I was shocked at the fact that there was absolutely nothing ("bee stings" my friend said when I mentioned them). If I had just been looking at their chests and nothing more, I would have thought they were men.
While I was watching them do their thing, all I wanted to do was pay one of them enough for her to tell me the truth - do they actually enjoy any part of their job? Which part? What do they actually want to be doing (the real answer; not the one they give the clients)? Do their friends and family know what they do? How high/drunk are they when they're dancing?
I had thought that my friend would get extra attention for being there with a woman. He wasn't, after all, one of those creepy guys who go to a strip club alone.
The opposite happened, however, which surprised me. He got zero attention and the guys who were there alone or with a buddy got all the attention, which led me to conclude that a woman may be the best wingman, but not to pick up strippers.
I was also surprised how much the men could touch the women. They weren't coping a feel or anything, but they were running their hands up and down their legs and backs when they were dancing, which I had thought was strictly forbidden. But this was also not exactly the classiest place, so you live and learn.
So after we had watched all the strippers, we picked our favorite (which happened to be the blond we saw right when we walked in) to tip. I saw the way the women were picking up the tips from the other tippers (including with their crotch as they did this crazy headstand flip to trap the bill between their legs), so I was a little nervous and was hoping just to give the girl some cash.
So when I slid the dollar bill toward her, I kind of pulled away. She, however, gave me a wide grin and leaned in toward me like she was going to give me a hug. Instead she mashed my face against her breast and I left still smelling her perfume on my shirt.
Never have I ever gone to a strip club to watch the show, and next time I'll see if I can have that conversation with one of the girls to assuage my curiosity.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Day 215: Shakespeare's High School Poetry... On Not Enough Training In The Kitchen
An ABC Poem is one that has five lines and creates a mood, picture, or feeling. Lines 1 through 4 are made up of words, phrases or clauses while the first word of each line is in alphabetical order. Line 5 is one sentence long and begins with any letter.
I spend a good part of my Sundays in the kitchen. I like to make really good Sunday dinners, and while I'm in there, I also make lunches and snacks for the week. This poem is about the sometimes unknown aspects of how food will turn out in the kitchen. And the daunting task of cooking after a full day's work.
Kitchen Dreams... Or Nightmares
Although I don't always know what the outcome will be
Because I've never had any formal training
Cooking and experimenting in the kitchen is something I enjoy
Doing, but only on weekends.
Evenings during the week are meant for takeout.
I spend a good part of my Sundays in the kitchen. I like to make really good Sunday dinners, and while I'm in there, I also make lunches and snacks for the week. This poem is about the sometimes unknown aspects of how food will turn out in the kitchen. And the daunting task of cooking after a full day's work.
Kitchen Dreams... Or Nightmares
Although I don't always know what the outcome will be
Because I've never had any formal training
Cooking and experimenting in the kitchen is something I enjoy
Doing, but only on weekends.
Evenings during the week are meant for takeout.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)